Just Me/ Just write and be you! Ray’Elaine!
She is still guarded because many thieves came in before broke her trust and held her mind hostage. She is still trying to break free. She working on it. taking a while!
Just Me — Just Write
I keep my feelings bottled up
Locked away from prying eyes
For fear of judgment or rejection
Or the pain of being criticized
I smile and nod and play along
But inside I’m a stormy sea
My emotions churning and roiling
But no one knows the real me
I’m afraid of being vulnerable
Of showing my true self
So, I keep my guard up constantly
And put my feelings on the shelf
But I know this isn’t healthy
To keep it all inside
I need to find a way to open up
And let my emotions take a ride
To let my true self show
-Bottled Up-
Blessings and Love!
Thank you for reading.
I am a fortress, built of stone and steel
My heart encased, unable to feel
I am tough, hardened by life’s cruel cost
But lost, adrift, with no sense of exhaust.
My walls are high, my moat is deep
My guard is up, my secrets to keep
I am impenetrable, a force to behold
Yet inside I am empty, alone and cold.
I’ve been hurt before, too many times
So I protect myself, with these hardened lines
I don’t let anyone in, no matter how close
For fear of the pain, the hurt and the blows.
But sometimes I wonder, is it worth the cost
To be tough, hard, guarded and lost?
To live life in solitude, with no one to trust
Is this really what it means to be tough?
-Tough-
Blessings and Love! 🖤🤎💙💚🧡💛💗💜🤍❤
Thank you for reading.
Really think I have issues lol. Like damn why am I so guarded with people. I am so on edge. Attitude issues as well. And can easily walk away from people to keep myself from getting hurt. Seriously I am too good at goodbyes. 🤦🏾♀️ Yes serious issues. Over thinker here.
There are so many issues I really need to work on. This process is hard. Ohhh man. I’m just thinking out loud with too much on my mind. Y’all sometimes I irritate my own self when feeling like too much on my shoulders lol..So much damn anxiety
Okay I’m done. Hope everyone is doing better!!
***Vent Session***
Blessing and Love!
Thanks for reading.
Heart Guarded…
Sometimes I hate that I am so guarded, and I keep everything in. emotions are bottled up and I do not show that side of me. I do not fully put my feelings out there because I have feelings of being wronged and hurt. I do not like to love and be vulnerable, people will use that against you. That is why I guard my mind and my heart. It is true that I can be afraid of rejection. I do not trust easily either I have major trust issues and I know that is holding me back, but I cannot just fully put my trust in others. I am also guarded because I feel like people have negative motives, and I do not like that shit. I am guarded because I have not healed from my past, I need to let go and move on. Is it bad that I cannot let my guard down? Working on changing that, maybe just do not want to get hurt anymore I’ so freaking over it. I am just thinking out loud, my crazy thoughts. SMH it how I am feeling though. My heart is guarded. I need help!
Thank you for reading, please feel free to like, comment, and share.
#HeartGuarded #Mythoughts #JustWrite
Just Write 