Tag Archives: Faith

My Heart Guarded

Short Stories, thoughts, , , , , , , , ,

Heart Guarded…

Sometimes I hate that I am so guarded, and I keep everything in. emotions are bottled up and I do not show that side of me. I do not fully put my feelings out there because I have feelings of being wronged and hurt. I do not like to love and be vulnerable, people will use that against you. That is why I guard my mind and my heart. It is true that I can be afraid of rejection. I do not trust easily either I have major trust issues and I know that is holding me back, but I cannot just fully put my trust in others. I am also guarded because I feel like people have negative motives, and I do not like that shit. I am guarded because I have not healed from my past, I need to let go and move on. Is it bad that I cannot let my guard down? Working on changing that, maybe just do not want to get hurt anymore I’ so freaking over it. I am just thinking out loud, my crazy thoughts. SMH it how I am feeling though. My heart is guarded. I need help!

Thank you for reading, please feel free to like, comment, and share.

#HeartGuarded #Mythoughts #JustWrite

Wasted Time

Short Stories, thoughts, , , , , , , , , ,

Wasted time

Have you ever met somebody, and you hit it off, and you two get along? The good conversations, then boom it freaking ends. Ugh I hate that. That is why I try not to get too attached and get my feelings involved, because people will switch up and change on you. Like do not introduce me to that if you cannot keep it up. I do not like the “oh I will talk to you only on my time” which is when or who knows when can you say irritated? I like consistency is that hard to ask for? I also do not like my time wasted that is so annoying or do not like my damn feelings hurt. These days it is so hard to find a nice genuine person like myself. Maybe I will take a seat and focus on me. Time to myself and not worrying about pleasing the next person. I really liked the person but oh well what can you do? I will move on and let it go. Whatever. Wasted my damn time, SMH

Thank you for reading.

#MyThoghts #JustWrite

Learn to Love

poetry, thoughts, , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Gentle guidance with a patient pace

Learning to love it is a daunting race

Heart aflutter, mind is a maze

Fumbling steps, unsure ways

With each stumble, we grow wise

Love’s mysteries, we begin to surmise

Through trials and errors, we improvise

And in our hearts, love multiplies

The ghazal of love, a journey long

But with each step, we grow strong

Learning to love, a lifelong song

With each verse, our hearts belong.

-Learn to Love-

Blessings and Love

Thank you for reading.

A Purpose! 

poetry, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Lost in the maze of life’s design 

I search for purpose, a grand design 

I wander through the winding trails 

Hoping that my destiny unveils 

I seek for love, a shining star 

To guide me from the shadows afar 

I yearn for someone to hold my hand 

And lead me to the promised land 

In the quiet of the night, I pray 

For a sign to light my way 

I search for answers in every place 

Hoping to find my rightful space 

Oh, the quest for purpose and love 

A journey that’s always challenging to prove 

But I’ll keep searching, never giving up 

For I know someday, I’ll find my luck 

Still searching…. 

-A Purpose- 

Blessings and Love! 🖤🤎💙💗💚🧡❤🤍💜

Thank you for reading. 

Wishing…

Poems, , , , , , , , , , , ,

Wishing I was better than I was yesterday

Wishing my dreams would happen overnight

Wishing I can stop the overthinking

Wishing my grandma and mom were here

Wishing I can forget all the problems

Wishing life was a little easier

Wishing I had someone who shares my hopes and dreams

Wishing I was not lonely

Wishing for a calm mind

Wishing for more strength

It is just a night

Of wishful thinking

The wishing continues….

Blessings and Love

Thank you for reading.

Elevate! 

Poems, poetry, , , , , , , , , , , ,

Elevating, believing in myself 

I hear my voice. It echoes with wealth 

A wealth of confidence and inner strength 

A power within that goes to great length 

Lengths that I once thought were out of reach 

Now I know that my goals I can breach 

My doubts and fears fall away like dust 

As I rise higher in myself, I trust 

Trust in the journey, trust in the climb 

With each step forward, I’m on the incline 

The top may be far, but I will prevail 

For I am capable, and my spirit will not fail 

Elevating, believing in myself 

I hear my voice. It echoes with wealth! 

Blessings and Love! 

Thank you for reading. 

Football Girl 

Uncategorized, , , , , , , , , , , ,

There once was a girl who loved football 
Her team loyalty, she did not cull 
With the NFL on the screen 
She was living her dream 
Having fun and feeling those chill vibes in full 

She’d cheer for her team with great pride 
Her passion for the game could not hide 
Her love for football 
Was infectious to all 
And with her, others would soon abide 

On game day, she’d gather with friends 
Their excitement, she’d always extend 
With snacks and drinks in tow 
They’d watch the game’s flow 
And celebrate each touchdown in the end 

If you’re a football girl at heart 
Don’t be afraid to let out a shout or a fart 
Embrace your love for the game 
And let it ignite a flame 
Of fun and chill vibes that never depart 

-Football Girl- 

Blesslings and Love! 

Thank you for reading. 

I Come From

Poems, poetry, , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

I Come From

Faith, Strength, and Love

I Come From

A place of dedication, hard work, and common sense

I Come From

Beautiful magic, secrete potions, and jungles

I Come From

A place of truth, passion, and hope

I Come From

Time, Life, and Music

I Come From

A place of vulnerability, fear, and worry

I Come From

Inspiration, Deep Souls, and light

I Come From

A place of the good, the bad, the evil

I Come From

As you see

Many places!

-I Come From-

Blessings and Love!!

Thank you for reading.

Letting it all out…

Short Stories, thoughts, , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Letting it out…

My heart and mind are heavy, my heart hurts. I feel broken and I have been trying to remain positive and pray about my life and the feelings I have. I have made post about being positive and taking care of self, but lately nothing is working for me. I feel so empty and lost. Since my mom has passed away it seems that everything in my life, the past has surfaced. I am constantly thinking of the bad, cruel, and all the shitty things that has happened to me since I was a child hate this feeling and I do not know why everything is coming to mind and heart. I try to keep busy, so I do not think about stuff, but no matter what it happens, I’m thinking and sad and crying. Another thing is the nightmares which that right there is scary some things happened to me, and I still have nightmares about it and also nightmares of me seeing my mom’s lifeless body. That is why I have not been sleeping really. I see my mom and her condition before she passed. I was taking care of her while she was in hospice care from home and watching her day-by-day change and watching her body fail and seeing her take her last breath the look on her face and all, that is what I see when I am trying to sleep. It was so hard to see and horrible going through it. It is still hard for me it has been 5 years, 5 months, 23 days ago and I’m still not over it at all. I do not know what to do.

Yes, I am not going to lie I am mad, mad at the world, and mad at myself. I have been feeling like I do not want to be here on this earth. Like, why cannot I shake these feelings, I do not like feeling this way, all I do lately is cry, cry, cry, cry. Why is it so hard? I have been too much in my mind and in the past for some weeks now, and it has me all messed up, and very emotional.

Damn, what is going on with me? For those who have lost someone, how do you go on? How to you heal?

It is hard and I feel very lonely and scared ad mainly scared of myself. Again, trying to make it through the days but it seems my life is spiraling. Sigh, what to do? Letting it all out tonight. My feelings, my thoughts sorry to those who feel it is a dark and negative blog entry. I am my true self and I express my true. Just going through a lot and emotional and need to vent. Thank you for reading.

Addiction

Poems, poetry, , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

This addiction I have

Got me in a chokehold

Trying to break free

Addiction

Taking control of me

My thoughts

My movements

My soul

Addiction

Sometimes is scary

To let go

Addiction

Who became a friend of mine

Best friends

He say we are friends forever

Addiction

Got me in a

Daze

Sometimes not seeing straight

My mental completely off

And it causes an uproar

Addiction

The things I crave

Fighting through it all

But this Addiction

Still

Has me in a drunken daze

DAMN…

Blessings and Love

Thank you for reading.

***A poem!***