Category Archives: thoughts

Want What You Cannot Have.

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Want it, Can’t Have it…..

Have you been in a situation where you have to walk away from someone love because you knew in your heart that the two you would not have worked out? I am just sitting here thinking of that person and I miss him. Been feeling so lonely lately and thinking and missing him is making me feel worse because that is who I want. Badly. I miss the way he used to look at me, our conversations, our silliness, our vibe, the compliments, and him always being real with me. We had to walk away from each other, and it still hurts. I want him in my life, and I still feel that it would not work out for me due to me knowing this person well the way they think, and their personality. Sometimes it annoys me wondering about what if. What would happen if we did have a relationship? What if we try now? Wondering if I made a mistake when I had to walkway from him. Hate feeling this way and again feel lonely and want him next to me even if not in a relationship with me just to talk to each other would be good. I need to find something to do because he is too much on my mind. SMH, I do not like it. He probably does not still feel the same way. Should I reach out or just leave it alone? Maybe too much time has passed.

 Or

Have you ever had a person in your life that could not let go? Did all the wrong things in the relationship and you endured a lot and decided to leave but they just will not let you go. Dealing with that currently. Yeah, today I am dealing with a lot got someone who wants me but I don’t want them I feel I tried so hard for years and got hurt and I am over it. Haven’t been with this person for years and they won’t let up. Yeah, fucking annoying. And then I want someone who probably does not want me or thinking about me at all, the difference is I am not bugging the other person or begging them to want me. Constantly calling or texting them. It is the want what I cannot have syndrome we both got I guess lol. Emotions are everywhere though

Damn, can I catch a break…. LOL a little too much at the moment.

That damn feeling of wanting what you cannot have……

Blessings and Love!

Thank you for reading.

Companionship!

Poems, poetry, thoughts, , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Companionship!

Needing

Longing

Wanting for those eyes

That stares back with soul,

Eyes that soothe you

Stares with love

Wanting for that touch

That

Brings comfort

Warmth

That hug

That

Brings calmness

Needing

Longing

Wanting for that heart

Pure

Believable

Heart

That brings

Trust

Security

Wanting to be someone

Who is

Wanted

Needed

Loved

Seen

Heard

Wanting for love

Same

I can give

Wanting for someone

Who brings

Light

Peace

Happiness

Wanting stability

Freedom

Loyalty

Respect

Family

Wanting

That

Good love

Passion

Dedication

Powerful

Needing

Longing for

Wanting

That

Desirable

Companionship!

Blessings and Love!

Thank you for reading.

Love, More Love!!!

https://writeblg.com/2021/12/08/true-love/
https://writeblg.com/2021/02/22/love-that/

Embrace

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In this life, it is important that you embrace yourself to the fullest. It is good to take the time to celebrate you. Embrace all that you have and love yourself to the fullest. Embrace the good times as well as the hard times, that is what makes you wiser and stronger. Embrace your healing process and be gentle with your mind, body, and spirit. Embrace your inner happiness and peace. Yes, life happens but always be true to yourself. Embrace yourself, embrace life….

All of it! Just Saying!!

Blessings and Love!

Thank you for reading.

***This post was inspired by my daughter, also a writer. She thought that I should write about embracing yourself. Big shout out to her, got to love her***

I, Self-Aware

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I am a force, self-sufficient and strong

Independent in my choices all day long

Love is my fuel, my passion, and drive

I thrive on it, and it keeps me alive.

My heart beats with a rhythm of its own

Guiding me as I walk life’s unknowns

I am tough, resilient, and unbreakable

My spirit unwavering and unshakable.

I love myself most, but I love others too

For love is the bond that makes us all new

I stand tall, proud, and free

My independence is a testament to me.

-I, Self-Aware-

Blessings and Love! 🖤🤎💙💛💗💚🧡❤🤍💜

Thank you for reading.

Battle with myself

Poems, poetry, Short Stories, thoughts, , , , , , , , , ,

Battle with myself!

I look in the mirror and there are times where I do not like who is starring back

Telling myself to face my fears, be strong

I am battling myself it is tough battle trying to keep control of what is going on around me

I feel like I am losing. The doubting myself, feeling ashamed, I am feeling unworthy

I am battling myself through it all the good, the bad, and most definitely the ugly and the worst

I am my own worst enemy hard on me

Sometimes I like who and what I see and times I do not

I say to myself to suck it up it is life

Battling myself trying to keep from crying

Trying hard to fix my crown

Daily struggles sometimes hold me back

Battling myself this woman is hard to deal with

Tough and strong I say back to the mirror you got this, keep going, stop being in your own way

Battling myself I say take a breather and get back to it

Battling myself it is me versus me

A battle I will come out on top of

Me battling myself through it all enough is enough

Me battling myself it is time I choose I as I stare back in the mirror with a smile

I chose I in this battle with myself!

T.O.L-Heal/Hurt

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Healing the hurt

If you don’t heal what hurt, you

Heal what lost you

Heal your mind

Body

Soul

You will bleed on people

Who did not cut you

Who tries to be there

For you

Who loves you

That is why healing and becoming one

With self is important.

Heal and let all the hurt go

Can be easier said than done

Can be a long process

You should still try!

Just Heal!

Thinking out loud.  

Blessings and Love!

Thank you for reading.

I am Healing!
Heal (Trying)

Unhealthy Habits II

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I made a blog about unhealthy habits 3 years ago. Sadly, not so many changes were made. Here I am again in 2025, still needing to change these unhealthy habits. I want and need to start with stopping the smoking of cigarettes. This very unhealthy habit is one I really need to change. Damn unhealthy habits.

It has been on my mind heavily lately, so I know for sure that it is something I need to do. I am turning 38 in a month, and I’m in need of a few changes. I can keep doing the stuff I have been doing. I am proud of myself for getting my diabetes under control, but now I have hypertension, and smoking is bad for both conditions. Bad for my overall health. Ugh, unhealthy habits.

I will be starting the process of quitting cigarettes soon, and I know it will not be easy (though I wish it were). I am willing to put in the work to make this change and this awful unhealthy habit. These unhealthy habits need to be gone. I am thinking about keeping a journal during this process. I want to document both the positive and negative aspects throughout this process. I got this. I need to find new hobbies and need to stay busy. I also need a new way of thinking. Damn unhealthy habits.

Have you tried to stop something you were use to? How did you cope? Any advice for me?

-Unhealthy Habits II-

Blessings and Love!

Thank you for reading.

Unhealthy Habits.

Slow

Forget…

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Forget

Want to let it all go

Forget the past, forget the humiliation

Forget the hurt, forget it all

Forget the people who played a part in my hurt

Forget those who knew but did not help, looked away

Forget those who said they care, but really do not

Forget the feelings I had, forget my tears

Forget being a child, forget all of my childhood

Damn

Forget having too much weight on my shoulders

Forget getting over shit alone and afraid

Damn yall

I just want to forget

Forget it all…

Thank you for reading.

Mad….

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Mad at life, mad at the world, mad

The anger within me makes me feel so bad

Why does everything have to be so hard?

Why can’t life just give me a break, a card?

I’m tired of struggling, tired of the pain,

I want to scream, to shout, to break the chains

But instead, I bottle it up, keep it inside

And let the anger fester, grow, and hide.

I know I shouldn’t be so mad at life

But sometimes it feels like an endless strife

I try to find hope, to see the light

But it’s hard to do when everything feels like a fight.

So, I’ll keep on going, keep on trying

And maybe one day, I’ll stop my crying

Until then, I’ll be mad at life, mad at the world, mad

And hope that someday, things won’t be so bad.

-MAD-

***A Poem***

Blessings and Love!

Thank you for reading.