At this point I feel helpless, hopeless, soul less. Feel numb to it all my days and nights are a blur. I am constantly pacing and can not focus. Music helps a little. Heart is steadily racing and thinking the worst. It is really bad cause I don’t have anyone to talk to and I have to put on a happy face through all the pain I’m going through. Damn this feeling I freaking hate it. Emotions are up and down, feel like I am losing it. Only way I feel a little calm is when I am writing and the last couple days that has been hard to do. Knowing that you are losing someone is a lot to deal with and I am not taking it well at all, on top of the daily struggles and taking care of a family. Anxiety been at a high just craziness. Ugh calm down and breathe. Sorry people it’s how I feel right now got to let it out, forever venting, my feelings, my thoughts, my life. Just Write about it. Thank you for reading.
Tag Archives: Love
Bottom of the Bottle!
Bottom of the bottle
Bottle of liquor in hand, bottle to lips
Way gone but still going
Problems? What problems? That don’t matter to me
Bottle in hand, bottle to lips
Music taking me places, I am in a daze
My own world, My own damn rules
Bottle in hand, bottle to lips
I feel numb, nothing can touch me
Stress? What stress? Yeah, I do not care
Bottle in hand, bottle to lips
Wondering should I stop, should I care
But I do not want to feel anything, or see anything
Bottle in hand, bottle to lips
Life what fucking life? Forget all battles
To drunk to notice anything
Damn is my life at the bottom of this bottle in my hand
Should I continue to put it to my lips
Bottle in hand, bottle to lips
Drunk and gone, gone, gone gone, gone
Damn this bottle in my hand, damn the bottom of this bottle….
Thank you for reading!
***Just a Poem!!!***
Prayers!
Prayers
Today I want to pray for those who are dealing with this bad weather and the snowstorms and ice storms all over. I am in Minnesota so somewhat used to this weather, but I have heard that states like Texas who is getting hit with this weather and this is new for them. Just praying for those who do not know what to do and who are facing challenges due to what is going on. Also want to pray for those who is dealing with a loved one or their self-due to covid-19. Praying for love and healing for this world. It seems so much is going on. Sending love and prayers to everyone. Remember to love yourself and those around especially during the hard times, things are a little crazy at the moment. Also praying for my family, the situation with my mom is not getting better. I am scared and lost, lately the days has been a blur. Praying for better days for us all. Just venting letting it out, prayers going up. Hope you have Peace, Love, Happiness, Blessings.
Thank for supporting me and thank you for reading.
Hay Happy Wednesday
Hello people! Happy Wednesday!
It has been some days and I haven’t been writing, but here I am back at it. Last week was a crazy week and my weekend was busy. Went on a trip with my family and did not get a chance to write. How are you all doing today? Want to talk about the trip and my thought and feeling of course.
Weekend Trip
So, on Saturday morning my mom, my sister, and my brothers myself and our kids drove to Kansas City Missouri, a 6- 8-hour drive. Yeah, we lost the Super Bowl this past Sunday, but it’s still GO Chiefs!! Okay back to it lol the reason for our trip was for our mom to see her family she really wanted to see her dad. It was a nice trip although it was a short one. I was happy to see my grandpa it has been about 5 years since I last seen him so that was cool. Also seeing my cousins who I have not seen in over 10 years (Crazy) even though we didn’t get a chance to hangout seeing their faces and talking to them for a little bit was great. Even though the long drive with kids had my anxiety at a high I enjoyed the trip. I was happy that my mom got to see her family and her home so overall it was cool.
My emotions are still everywhere but I am dealing with it. Taking it one day at a time and doing my breathing exercises. Like I stated above I have not been writing, so I am going to try to write an entry for my gratitude journal, and then write and focus on my book. I have been slacking too much lately and I need to get back into my groove. Still stuck on a chapter for the book but I will push through and make it happen. Also going over my monthly goals and probably add more and make some adjustments. Due to what is going on and me thinking about the unknown I am trying to keep busy and not think too much. What are your plans for the day? Remember to love yourself always and love those close to you. Wish you all Love, Peace, Happiness, and Blessings.
Thank you for reading.
Calm
Calm, Calm, Calm....
One of those up all night, up thinking and I know that I need to try to stay calm.
Read some good quotes and said a prayer. I really need it!
Calm down and breathe……
Breathe...
Overwhelmed😫
Overwhelmed...
This is so true but very hard to do. Anyone else?
and being very overwhelmed by it. Annoying
Are you someone who smiles through it all even though you are so stressed out with everything around you. You feel like it is too much to handle. Not going to lie I AM. Ugh again ANNOYING
Breathe....
Being overwhelmed feels like ton of pressure (well to me) on you. And I get crazy anxiety so I really be feeling all types of ways. Man it freaking sucks. But we got this. Right?
Yeah we do.
Breathe....
Just a lot of thinking this Early Morning..... I feel overwhelmed now and should go to bed. Wanted to share some quotes and how I feel about being overwhelmed. Thank you!!!
February!
February!
Hello everyone! Welcome to February. How was your month of January? if you follow me then you know mine has been not too good. Looking and hoping to change that this month. Praying for guidance, understanding, patience, love, and happiness. I hope your month of February brings you love, healing, happiness, guidance, and blessings. I hope that this month is better than the last. I am keeping faith and hope and keeping my head held high. Things are hectic at the moment, but I stay prayed up! Oh, a good thing is my son turns eleven this month YAYYYYY!!! February 2021 is here. What do you have planned this month? Any new goals for the month?
Thank you for reading.
Worth/Worthy!!!
Worth- the value of something measured by its qualities or by the esteem in which it is held
Love this. Perfectyl said!!
And I will not beg a person to see my worth
I am worthy, I am enough!!!
So Are YOU!
I Smile II
I Smile II
I smile to keep from crying
Even when too, much is going on around me
I smile to hide my true self from people
I smile it is better than a wet and sad face
I smile pretending, do not want anyone to know
I smile to try to get through the day
I smile while wanting to get away
And with all that and more
I smile!
Thank you for reading.
Hope
No writing today it has been rough and more bad news but didn’t want to post something negative so maybe something uplifting. Pray and Hope for the best is all I can do. Have a goodnight people and blessings.
Hope and Faith. Love and Life. Believe!
HOPE!
Thank You.
