*Write about a taboo subject you find to be taboo in our society.
A subject that I feel that is taboo in our society is mental health/Illness. I know that there are many people dealing with mental health issues and are scared to talk about it. Feeling ashamed about how they are feeling and about what they are going through. It is a tough topic to discuss I feel due to others judging and being mean about it. Some people look at you differently and treat you differently due to your mental illness. It happens to a lot of people, who suffers in silence and have no one to talk to or no support because they feel people would look down on them. It is crazy because that is true, some people feel that others should not be down, depressed or have anxiety or any other kind of mental illness. I have actually met a few people like this. Maybe because their life is put together. I don’t know. Mental health/illness is an important subject, everyone deserves to be happy and have support when they need help. Also, it is important to seek help no matter what others think. It is hard and you might feel like you are being a burden, but getting help and healing is key. I would never understand why talking about what is going on with you is a problem, to families, friends anybody. Including myself or why some cannot or won’t accept it.
Trust, I know about this all too well. It took me years to express any of my feelings or talk about what I was going through and really feeling. I did it first by writing down my feelings, my rage and then why I was feeling that way, I know this method will not always work for others. I also talk to my sister about some stuff. Still, I get from time-to-time people who laugh about it, my feelings, or if I talk about having anxiety or depression. They think that I am dumb or weak for feeling the way that I do. It is hard to find somebody who genuinely care about your well-being, or mental stability. I am not saying that it is another person responsibility for your happiness just would be great to a have a little support on your process of healing. Some kindness or keep their thoughts to themselves would be cool. We all need to find something that helps us, soothe us in a good way. And not doing things in a bad way that can further hurt us.
Everybody needs somebody and I honestly didn’t use to think like this. I always thought that I should handle everything on my own. Sometimes still do, hard to ask for help and something I need to work on.
I wish that more people can be themselves and if they need the help seek it. My thoughts about mental health, it’s hard to deal with. I really do think this is a taboo subject. What do you think? Agree? Disagree
I would love to hear more thoughts about this subject.
Tonight, I am too much in my head. So much going on lately, with personal and work as well as my business. I have so many decisions to make in the next week and a half about my new business, and I am wrecking my mind about it. It gets hectic doing it all on your own (SIGH). Sometimes I feel stuck. Over analyzer. Miss overthinker, as always. Haven’t been meeting my writing goals either my mood has completely been down, and been overthinking that, so I have to work on that. And that’s not all I am overthinking about. My mom’s birthday is coming up and the emotions have started already. And I am constantly thinking about her all the memories and her smile. A crazy and lonely night for me. Yeah, soooooo much going on up in my head…Feel likes too much weight I am carrying. Guess it is bedtime for me. I am a mess right now and just want to curl up somewhere and cry it all out…. I wish I could stop all this damn overthinking and thinking on too much at once. Yall know I have to vent it out!
This too shall pass! Lord be with me.
With that being said I am going to sleep and pray on it Whew just need a breather.
Sometimes things happen in life that is out of our control and at times it can be hard to deal with. Having to deal with all the emotions that come from different situations in your life can be difficult. Trust I know. Take it one day at a time. Take deep breaths, pray.
Trust your healing process and know that everything will be ok. Take it one day at a time. If you feel you need to rest, take a break do that, calm yourself it will be okay.
In life sometimes it’s best to slow down and focus on your mental health. Make sure you are good. Take time for you. Have strength and courage. Have faith. Be kind to yourself and trust I know it’s hard when taking care of a family but it is important. Be a gentle you, a more focused you. I am still healing and I know that sometimes it is ok to not be okay but pick yourself back up. Learning to love me more everyday and wish the same for others. Again I am still healing and a work in progress.
Sitting here thinking bout publishing my own poetry books and other books I have in the works. Love poetry and writing it on all types of topics and ready to write a poetry book. Honestly, I do not know where to start, I have some poems that I want in the book, but no title yet and it is something I have been brainstorming on for days.
So, no title, no cover designs, layout, and of course no idea on how to go about self-publishing it. So going to do some major research and see where that leads me. Want to get this poetry book out then continue to work on my other books and get those published as well.
My night consists of a lot of thinking, some research and of course writing. Trying to figure it all out and move forward with all my projects. Got so much going on right now. Whew BREATHE. I will get it done make things happen do the work that is necessary. Nervous about it but I got this. HELP LOL
Write, think, revise, write, chill that is my night. How is your night going? I hope it's good. Peace, Love, Happiness, and Blessings.
I walked away, I said I am done, I can not do this no more. I was in a relationship off and on for eight years, and there were only two years it was good, and I was happy in the relationship. I feel like I wasted my time, wasted my life, wasted my love, all while trying to help the other person build them up and give them chance after chance. During those years I forgot about myself. I stayed to try and work it out for our kids, again forgetting about myself forgetting about my feelings in the process. I felt alone and hopeless for years. He did not want to help me do anything or help with anything; he was just there. Talking was pointless because when I would speak my mind on how things were, I would get called names or he would say I was nagging and all I asked for was help with our kids and help with bills. I could never get that. I felt weak, lost, lonely, defeated, and depressed handling everything on my own including my own battles while in a relationship and taking care of everything. The relationship drained me, it was bad it was abuse on both of our sides and I am not happy about that, I was a different person, I became very mean and never wanted to be bother with. Deep depression and looking at my children face I knew we needed a change and that I needed to do better for them and focus only on them. Damn I honestly felt like I was shit, like I was no good. He always worked and had jobs and would get paid and go hang out with his family and friends his priorities were always off, that’s part of the reason I felt like I was no good because I could not get the man, I gave children to, gave my love to, and slept with every night could not help me with the simplest shit. Wow I cannot believe I went through that and stayed with him if I did. I went through so much hurt and pain and sadness alone. I could not talk to him, too many arguments, so I just shut down. Happy to say for the last two years I been single, but he stills begs to have his family back, and it gets annoying. Seriously how many chances should you give a person. Eight years and nothing had changed, and it seemed to be getting worse, so I had to end it for my peace, happiness, and sanity. Then he will tell me that nobody will ever want me and if they did it will only be for sex; he stills says that I am his forever. Just had to walk away. I made a post some days ago about how I felt about him, the hate is strong and the fact that he keeps wanting to get back together makes it worst. I do not understand why he wants to be together when I tried time after time to talk to him and figure things out and make it work but he never wanted to hear it. Now he mad because he messed up. Honestly feel like he was using me for a place to stay. Man, tired of it, all I want is peace. I do not like arguing with him and losing my cool. Wish he would understand, and we could co parent without the drama. Been trying to move on for two years and it has been a long ride.
Just had to let that out I do not want to be bitter about the past, I want to live happy and have no drama. Want this hatred out my heart, we do have to be around each other for our kids. Still lost and do not know what to do. I am just venting and getting my feelings out it was heavy on my mind, feel a little better. Praying for a better year.
Thank you for reading.
*Repost- wrote this 12/31/2020*
Wanted to share again, something I am happy I did.
Ugh this night is not going good. I am emotional and lonely. Wish I had someone to hold me tight right now. Just really want love right now. Mind is going miles. So much inside ugh. No one to talk to about it. I feel hopeless and scared and ALONE. I try not to think about certain stuff but it happens. It happens at weird times and I just cry. This night is bad and tomorrow marks one month since mom passed. Super emotional tonight. Ugh. Help. Oh man..... BREATHE, BREATHE, BREATHE
Hopefully rest will help. Hope you all are having a great night and weekend. Praying for all. Going to pray through these feelings and though times. Sorry for a sad post I'm getting my thoughts out! I have to be strong, I have too. Wishing you all Love, Peace, Happiness, and Blessings! 💙💙🖤🖤
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