Tag Archives: Overthinker

Another Vent Night!

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Venting….She Just Write! 🤷🏾‍♀️

Hello all,

 Really hate when I try my hardest to get over someone who my feelings were too involved with. Had strong feelings for them and I feel used, I feel uneasy. Seems like they really did not care about me, do not love me the way they said SMH. Been four months since I have heard from this person. But now he is trying to reach out to me. Like why? I am so pissed right now and yes; I am having a little anxiety. Have posted to my blog in the past about this person. No, it is not the first time he has just out of nowhere stopped talking to me. This is a cycle ugh and me do not like it at all. I do not understand it, maybe because twice already I have allowed it. Thinking he is already in a relationship and just talking to me for his convenience. In the past I did have feelings and wanted to give it another chance and that lasted all but three freaking months and not really with consistency. Here I go questioning myself and feeling confused and lost. So over it, told myself the last time that if he did it again that it would be done. I am standing on that. Cannot keep putting my love, my feelings, my soul, my mind, myself out there for people to keep hurting me, laughing at me. Especially when I am already going through so much stuff. Do not need the extra stress in my life.

Whew, breathe had to pause and write about this because it bothers me badly and you know that I like to write about how I feel. Let it all out. **Shrugs** SMH thinking damn again, why? What do he want from me? I know I am not the only one who have been here before. Hate when my feelings are strong and for the wrong freaking person. Now he misses me and want me, sending a lot of messages since Sunday evening. Need a drink something strong. It makes no sense. Was having a good day until this BS, UGH. Going to keep breathing and calm myself and focus on my writings. Try not to let it really get under my skin cause really have harsh ass words for him.

My feelings and venting are out and done, my bad if it’s too much for you all. Again, I vent and keep it real. He deserves my fist to his face seriously. Whew breathe again.

Am I crazy? The only one? Why? Hope your day and night was better.

Blessings all.

Thank you for reading.

#Vent #OVERIT

This song…Truth!!! 💜🖤💙💛

https://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=focused+ann+marie+

The Clouds

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The Clouds

Driving on the highway

Anywhere

I am in the passenger seat

Eyes misty

Eyes wide open

Starring up at

The Clouds

Wondering

Dazed and amazed

Starring up at

The Clouds

Daydreaming

Beauty of life

Beauty of colors

The clouds bring

Peace

Hope

The clouds

I get lost in

Quiet and peaceful

The Clouds

Starring up I

Know I will be okay

The Clouds

Such a Calmness

A scene

The Clouds

Mystery

The Unknown

Wondering

What is up there

The Clouds

What it brings

 The true meaning

Starring Up take it all in

The Clouds

I like, fascinated

Just love staring up and lost in

My thoughts

While looking up

At

The Clouds.

Blessings and Love!

Thank you for reading.

Ugh!! Miss OverThinker..

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Hello All

Tonight, I am too much in my head. So much going on lately, with personal and work as well as my business. I have so many decisions to make in the next week and a half about my new business, and I am wrecking my mind about it. It gets hectic doing it all on your own (SIGH). Sometimes I feel stuck. Over analyzer. Miss overthinker, as always. Haven’t been meeting my writing goals either my mood has completely been down, and been overthinking that, so I have to work on that. And that’s not all I am overthinking about. My mom’s birthday is coming up and the emotions have started already. And I am constantly thinking about her all the memories and her smile. A crazy and lonely night for me. Yeah, soooooo much going on up in my head…Feel likes too much weight I am carrying. Guess it is bedtime for me. I am a mess right now and just want to curl up somewhere and cry it all out…. I wish I could stop all this damn overthinking and thinking on too much at once. Yall know I have to vent it out!

This too shall pass! Lord be with me.

With that being said I am going to sleep and pray on it Whew just need a breather.

Hope you all are having a good night.

Blessings and Love

Thank you for reading.

Wishing

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Wishing I was better than I was yesterday

Wishing my dreams would happen overnight

Wishing I can stop the overthinking

Wishing my grandma and mom were here

Wishing I can forget all the problems

Wishing life was a little easier

Wishing I had someone who shares my hopes and dreams

Wishing I was not lonely

Wishing for a calm mind

Wishing for more strength

It is just a night

Of wishful thinking

The wishing continues….

Blessings and Love

Thank you for reading.

Control

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Control

When you think of control what does it mean to you?

Control to me is having a say over any and everything. Have to be up close and have a hand in everything that is going on around you. Including control over people.

Man, man, man I hate when things are out of my control. I am a Leo and yes sometimes I am bossy and must control everything around me. When something is out of my control, I feel lost, nervous, my body shakes I feel anxious, and I get easily irritated. Anybody else like that? I be a nervous wreck and constantly questioning everything. Then I am overthinking and worrying, crazy huh?

Some people say to me that its ok to let go of having control over everything and relax. It is hard to do that thought. I have been thinking about it lately and maybe I should let go a little, take it one day at a time, relax, do not go overboard, and try to run people lives. I mean how hard can it be? Where do I start? Are there any other control freaks out there? Help lol

Happy Writing!!!

Love, Peace, Happiness, and Blessings!

Thank You For Reading.

Thank you for reading!

Too Good to be TRUE..

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Too good to be true…

So tonight, I am sitting and thinking. And of course, this damn dude is on my mind. Like what the fuck, why? My emotions are everywhere and yes, I am a little tipsy and besides what I am dealing with I am thinking of him. Again why? Oh, my yall I am irritating my damn self at the moment. Cannot help but to think is this real? Does he really feel the same way I do, shit does he really like me? Here I go feeling young-minded and questioning myself and the situation instead of letting it all go and that is not good. Just feel confused and out of it, maybe I should just walk away and forget it all thought it was what I wanted but I do not know now. I have mixed emotions and we are both dealing with things. That is why I do not like putting my feelings out there I feel dumb and used it to benefit them talk and texting on their time. Thinking yeah it is too good to be true. Just wish I could find realness, real love besides what I can offer. Ugh it's

too good to be true and I am pissed off. I really need a friend and love I feel dumb and stupid and I am thinking why me why I cannot get what I give. Venting, thinking, and letting it all out, I am rambling, ugh irritated though.

Thank you for reading.

Feels!

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Okay, so I must vent for a minute. Yall know how I do. I am having some feelings about that oh is this shit too good to be true, am I close to my dreams, and sometimes my damn trust issues are at play. I am almost finished with my book and ready to take off. At this moment I really do not trust shit. This weekend and the dates are memories I hate thinking about, so that got me feeling all types of ways.  Emotions are everywhere tonight. And honestly, no one to talk to well on my blog. Just doing so much thinking tonight, maybe I need to go to bed, and try again tomorrow. Glad I got some goals done though.  A calm mind and rest!!!! Thanks for all the support!

I hope everyone else night was great and happy Father’s Day to all the fathers out there. Hope your day was fun and exciting. Remember to love yourself and keep those you love close.  Goodnight!

Blessings and Love

Thank you for reading.

Scars

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Scars inside and out

Deep wounds

Can never be fixed

Scars

Still remain

Walk with me, guide me

The scars

Not pretty

Inside and out

The scars I carry with me

So deep

Nightmares appear

The scars are here

Forever

The scars

Inside and out

I

Cannot hide

Flesh open

Cries are loud

Scars remain

I wonder why.

No help

There’s nobody

Damn scars

On my mind, body

Drowning

Am I still alive?

These

Scars

Sometimes visible

These scars sometimes

Not….Damn

Scars….

Blessings and Love.

Thank you for reading.

**A Poem**

T.O.L-What a Day, Overthinking

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Sometimes I wonder where all this overthinking gets me. I do not like it and tonight my mind is in overboard, elevated level, overload, just going miles. So much is on my mind, tried to keep busy with writing, then tried watching tv but that did not last long. Ugh, need to go to bed seriously praying tomorrow is a better day. Just thinking out loud. And I hate being emotional. What a day. What a night.

Hope yall night is better!

Blessings and Love!

Thank you for reading.