In the eerie night, a witch took flight Her broomstick riding high But as she soared, she grew bored And pulled out her phone with a sigh The device was new, its features grand And the witch was quite impressed She scrolled and swiped with her bony hand Until she became possessed The phone controlled her every thought Her fingers, they did shake The witch was trapped, a prisoner caught In a techno-magical state She tried to break free, to no avail The phone had taken hold The witch was trapped, her face grew pale As her story did unfold So listen well, all you young and old And heed this warning true Don’t let your phone take a hold Or it may possess you too!
How long does it take for you to really like a person? How long does it take you to let them know how you feel? Do you wait and be patient to see if the feelings are mutual? Or do you let them know right away and deal with the outcome regardless of what it is?
I am asking this because I am an overthinker and I am guarded. So, sometimes I hold back my true feelings and because I do not like rushing at anything. I tend to cut people off early on, regardless of how I feel about them. I question myself constantly as to why I am like this, why do I get scared of being in a relationship? Why do I fear that a person do not really want to be with me? I will avoid them and their questions. Sometimes I think it is because I fear that a person will hurt me, I feel their intentions are not pure (not healthy thinking).
Again, I do not know why I think this way. I hate it because, I have made connections and get along with certain people, they piss me off once and I cut them off with no problem. Yes, that is with family too. I do not like to be hurt, yes I know it is a part of life. I have had it where I do put my feelings out and the other person do not feel the same way and they admit that I was just someone to pass the time ( True as fuck) and I was crushed (No LIE) and want one thing from me( ugh so sad).
I admit here and now that I am scared of love, I am scared of commitment, scared of getting let down by someone I truly love, scared of showing all of me and in return I get shit on my face. It is hard to deal with and no lie, my pride, my ego gets in the way sometimes too. I convince myself that a person is no good for me. I do feel bad to those people who genuinely are there for me, they really care about my feelings, it is real love, and I avoid them because of my own issues, my trust issues. Shit that has noting to do with them. I try to get over this and let things flow. But damn my head and my heart have crazy battles, head-to-head clashing most of the time. I really need help to deal with my crazy ways.
How do I fully let my guard down without so much overthinking? How do I fully put my heart and trust into someone else hands? I feel like I self-sabotage. Been doing this for years and probably missed out on real connections, and opportunities. Wanted to talk about this and let this out because I feel like I have finally met the person for me (I Think) but of course I am overthinking every damn thing, and do not want to move forward. Maybe I feel like he is not really real with me and honestly don’t mean shit to him, and I can definitely be wrong about it all,
Thinking and venting. Crazy I feel more comfortable with writing it out and sharing on my blog before letting him know. But my feelings and how I am dealing with it right now. So WHAT!
My blog peeps I need help (LOL) but seriously cause man, man, man he is on my mind constantly like all day. We have so much in common, I like him way more than I let him know, hell I want him something seriously but like I said above homegirl is scared. But why though?
Okay I am done venting on crazy stuff…. I need to seriously get it together. I am grown and need to act like it!
Anybody understand where I am coming from? Any advice? Been there before?
Hay people I want to talk about two of the biggest things in a relationship that I have to have. Number one is communication; this is a big deal for me especially going foreword with my life. I want a person I can be able to talk to and after talking have a clear understanding on whatever that was discussed. Communication is big in a relationship, it is good if you and your partner can communicate very well, when I say this I mean about any and everything. You and your partner can sit and talk and express how you feel. Communication was one of the reasons my last relationship of 11 years did not work out. I got tired of repeating myself and trying to express what was on my mind the other person never wanted to talk or want to hear me and it was so stressful and irritating. You should be able to talk to the one you love and hope that they understand you. Listen to each other and have each other’s back.
Number two is trust which is a must. I know some will understand me on this. In a relationship you must trust your partner and believe in them. I do not see how you can have a relationship without trust and that is for any relationship type. You must trust a person with your heart, with your feelings, judgement, skills, and financial situations, and wat they tell you. You must trust that between the two it will work out putting your all into someone that you feel have your best interest at heart and that is a big thing to trust. It is not easy. Not talking about just cheating everything above and trusting that they can do the basic responsibilities in life. Can that person keep they word? Can they be who they say they are?. So much to consider and again it is hard especially when meeting a new person. If you have relationships based on lies it will not work, you must have foundation built on love, trust, communication, understanding, strength, faith and patience. Yes, it can be hard finding this but have faith. You have to work at it, relationships are hard work. I pray everyone find love, have faith and love with your all. What do you need in a relationship? What is a deal breaker for you? #JustWrite.
Walking away, this ish, man why is it hard to do. Even when you know you should, you know it is for the best. You know that you have tried your best. You took them back over and over no matter what. You constantly forgave them, even though you were hurting. You disregarded your feelings to make or keep them happy and for what? To get hurt, to be always crying. You see with your own damn eyes that nothing is getting better, it is a damn cycle that you are going through and yet it is still hard to walk away. When those around you also fee like the two of you should not be together, you do not hear them you still try. Even when that person shows you the real them, that they are all about self, they do not care at all. They do not want to change. Walking away is hard, and then you start to think about the few good times the two of you had, and you think maybe there is hope. In the back of your mind, you know you need to end it. Walking away can be a struggle people love hard and do not like to let go. Also feeling like you would never find a person to love you the right way, you stay and continue to deal with the drama it brings. That damn walking away takes time, it can be easy sometimes not texting or calling, and then there are times when you want that person near you. You want their touch, smell, their voice ugh its annoying. Walking away is necessary sometimes though there is no use in dragging on a relationship or situation, and that goes for anybody family relationship, romantic relationships, and friendships. Walking away from anybody or anything that you love or loved will always be a challenge. Man it is so hard.
Can you deal with it? How? Please feel free to leave feedback.
My heart and mind are heavy, my heart hurts. I feel broken and I have been trying to remain positive and pray about my life and the feelings I have. I have made post about being positive and taking care of self, but lately nothing is working for me. I feel so empty and lost. Since my mom has passed away it seems that everything in my life, the past has surfaced. I am constantly thinking of the bad, cruel, and all the shitty things that has happened to me since I was a child hate this feeling and I do not know why everything is coming to mind and heart. I try to keep busy, so I do not think about stuff, but no matter what it happens, I’m thinking and sad and crying. Another thing is the nightmares which that right there is scary some things happened to me, and I still have nightmares about it and also nightmares of me seeing my mom’s lifeless body. That is why I have not been sleeping really. I see my mom and her condition before she passed. I was taking care of her while she was in hospice care from home and watching her day-by-day change and watching her body fail and seeing her take her last breath the look on her face and all, that is what I see when I am trying to sleep. It was so hard to see and horrible going through it. It is still hard for me it has been four months and I’m not over it at all. I do not know what to do. Yes, I am not going to lie I am mad, mad at the world, and mad at myself. I have been feeling like I do not want to be here on this earth. Like, why cannot I shake these feelings, I do not like feeling this way, all I do lately is cry, cry, cry, cry. Why is it so hard? I have been too much in my mind and in the past for some weeks now, and it has me all messed up, and very emotional.
Damn, what is going on with me? For those who have lost someone, how do you go on? How to you heal?
It is hard and I feel very lonely and scared ad mainly scared of myself. Again, trying to make it through the days but it seems my life is spiraling. Sigh, what to do? Letting it all out tonight. My feelings, my thoughts sorry to those who feel it is a dark and negative blog entry. I am my true self and I express my true. Just going through a lot and emotional and need to vent. Thank you for reading.
When it’s time to move on, that’s just the thing to do. Do not try to force things. Sometimes it’s better to move on and focus on yourself. Everything happens for a reason and you can’t stay stuck wondering why. It can hurt if you have to let a person go but always put yourself and feelings first. Do what is right for you. Move on, heal, and become a better version of you.
Yes it will take time if hurt and pain is there, just take it one day at a time. Trust I know it’s hard. Even if it’s moving on from an old job, or leaving a state or town, changing school, anything. Change can be hard.
Moving on from anything in life can be challenging, have faith and pray that everything will be alright.
Just thinking tonight want to make some changes and move on from the past. Letting out my thoughts and feelings. Just Write and get it out!
Just Write 